Comedy Humor Funny Lucu

Rub It

2011-08-25T13:07:00.000-07:00

One day when the teacher walked to the black board, she noticed someone had

written the word 'penis' in tiny small letters. She turned around, scanned the

class looking for the guilty face. Finding none, she quickly erased it, and

began her class.

The next day she went into the room and she saw, in larger letters, the word

'penis' again on the black board. Again, she looked around in vain for the

culprit, but found none, so she proceeded with the day's lesson.

Every morning, for about a week, she went into the classroom and found the

same word written on the board, and each day it was written in larger letters.

Finally, one day, she walked in, expecting to be greeted by the same word on

the board, but instead, found the words, "The more you rub it, the bigger it

gets!"

Why It is Fun to Watch Indian Celebrities Tweeting? by Obat Gila

2011-06-30T08:09:00.000-07:00

COMEDY - Have you ever got indulged in Celebrity Stalking? Well, I don’t mean actually on your feet, but I’m pretty sure you have done that figuratively and this is what most of us do! If not then why even the news channels talk about the celebrities and their personal lives more and general issues less; why do even the leading national newspapers bring in gossips on the front page? Even Twitter is getting more users because it’s the latest mantra to know more about celebrities! Well, whatever you say, it has been found that people are joining Twitter more to know about the celebrities than the latest trends and news. Indeed reading the tweets of your favorite celebrities is a better way to stalk into their personal lives and feed your gossip hunger than newspaper columns and news channel flicks!

So you are a great fan of Indian Celebrities and read a lot of newspaper, magazine, watch a hell lot of TV. Reading newspaper and magazine gossip columns are fine but are they updated every minute? If you read film magazines, then you are helpless to wait for a week, or a fortnight, or even a month, depending on how many times the magazine gets published in a month. And if you religiously read the newspapers, you will still have to wait till the next morning to get the latest issue. Some may say that TV channels prove the best resort for the latest news about the celebs. That’s true but TV channels can’t get you what’s censored and what the glitterati have kept in complete secrecy.

Now you may argue saying how about googling about our favorite glitterati? Yeah, that’s really a great idea, but do you know that even Google picks up the tweets to bring the latest news to you? If you don’t believe just go and type your favorite celebs name in the search bar and click on ‘latest’ tab on the left hand side on the page. You’ll find all the tweets talking about the glitterati you have typed in the search bar. I did the same, this morning; I vaguely typed Hrithik Roshan, and there appeared numerous tweets talking about him! But it did not get me what Hrithik himself had said or commented; instead it had all that was said about him by others. Being a die-hard Hrithik fan I went to his Twitter profile to read what he had to say.

Reading about your favorite superstars and that to in their own words is a real fun, they tell you what they ate for the dinner, where did they go for the weekends, what are they doing at the moment and what are their future plans, etc. Sometimes they even open their hearts out telling you some of their secret desires and wishes and even their weaknesses! The other day I read Preity Zinta complaining about her laziness and inability to work out well at the gym! Honestly speaking, not following the tweets of your favorite stars is like letting your ice-cream melt even when it can be eaten!

But the trouble is one can hardly trust Google, in helping you search the authentic Twitter profiles of your favorite stars and moreover, following them all together at the same time from your Twitter profile mixes up all their tweets, but say thanks to God and technology that there are such applications available that lets you follow the authentic Twitter profiles under one roof!

Funny T Shirts That Will Get You Notice

2010-11-25T01:35:00.000-08:00

Comedy Humor Funny Lucu - To make someone laugh in these modern times is quite unique. One of the ways that we see people laughing is that they will see very funny slogan written on a funny t shirt on a person in the street or in a town centre. The person that would look at the funny tshirt might not agree with what’s written on the tshirt but they would still laugh because it might be a humorous slogan written on the shirt.

These days’s funny tshirts does appeal to everyone from teenagers to adults as it’s just asking out for an audience to look at it. If you have a very big family and you gathered together for a family dinner or a party then rather than teenagers getting all dressed up in formal wear teenagers feel much more comfortable in probably jeans, trainers, and a funny tshirt.

Teenagers with a bit of sense and humour might wear a funny tshirt to a family dinner that would say something like “Do I Really Need To Be Here” and with a sad unhappy face graphic next to that particular sentence.

The teenager wouldn’t necessarily feel that way but it’s just a bit of fun and humour, and most likely a lot the adults at that family dinner or party would laugh seeing that funny tshirt.

Another reason that people would laugh by seeing someone’s funny t shirt, is that it might remind them of their own character or situation that they might have been in at an earlier stage in their lifetime. What could even happen is that a women might see a funny tshirt a young teenager wearing it, and then laugh and then telling her partner reminding him of his youth.

Funny thsirts do play a very vital role in our lives, adding laughter, humour, somebody might even cry out of happiness when they would see something out of the blue maybe reminding them of a very special moment that they went through in their lifetime.

When it comes to wearing any kind of funny t shirts, I reckoned that it’s worn equally by girls as well as boys. I personally believe that maybe five to ten years ago more boys were wearing it but nowadays more girls as well as boys do wear funny t shirts on a daily basis.

Any young teenager whether they’re still at school, college, or even at university would defiantly have more than one funny tshirt, some even as more than five, and someone would even have as many as eleven and twelve. It’s as simple as what people can relate to, and the character and personality that the individual might have.

Humor And Funny One Line Jokes Crack-Up Comedy

2010-11-24T01:33:00.000-08:00

Comedy Humor Funny Lucu - Having been immersed in humorous prose of all kinds and funny one line jokes for so many years, I am now fairly certain that I can recognize humor when I see it without it having to leap up and bite me on the thigh, but I would not claim to know much more about it than that, except for the following brief points.

First of all, I would like to give a working definition of English humor: an odd, embarrassing or funny incident experienced or observed, and described later in a plain manner, which might or might not call for laughter. The English sense of humor is an agreeable mixture of a sense of fun and a sense of proportion, which is not at all the same thing as a taste for buffoonery. Perhaps a small axiom could be proposed: beware of people who only laugh at funny one line jokes.

A joke has a measurable potential of laughter; there are snigger-sized jokes, guffaw-sized jokes, and hearty laughter-sized jokes.
Humor has no such limitations for example, might only give the reader quiet pleasure and on the other hand if it catches the reader off guard and in the right mood, its effect can be violent and prolonged, inducing, in my case, uncontrollable surges of laughter, hiccups, and a curious snoring noise in trying to regain breath.

Humor does not put a value on itself by announcing that it is going to make you laugh. To tell someone to stop being funny or hilarious is to dictate to them what their sense of humor should be, and a sense of humor is a most personal possession that should not to be tampered with. Any attempt to alter personal comedy results whether they are only funny one line jokes.. is wanting the owner to end the piece asap and is recommended less than hilarious and rather disappointing.

It took some twelve years to assemble a representative selection of five hundred years of humorous prose. What emerged from the vast amount of material collected was that pure English humor, besides being itself, also functioned over the centuries like good stock in cookery, enriching other kinds of comedy and giving them added flavor. Wit with humor proved to be more appreciated than wit being clever all by itself, satire expressed through humor, was found to be more widely effective, jokes built on humorous observation had a deeper appeal.

Comedy does not work in a vacuum either, its audience has to be in the right mood of expectancy and confidence, a mood which a comedian must create with his opening remarks. In literature, a humorous writer has to set the receptive mood he wants his reader to be in with his opening paragraphs so the quoted humorous pieces and funny one line jokes, are set within a commentary which introduces them by describing how the extracts came to be written, or why, with perhaps facts or anecdotes or gossip about the author, or what was going on at the time, the aim being to bring the reader up to the beginning of each piece in a good frame of mind to appreciate it.

Top Ten Reasons That People Fall Out of Hammocks by Comedy Humor Funny Lucu

2010-11-23T01:29:00.000-08:00

HUMOR - We’ve all done it before, you are trying to get into the hammock, trying to balance your weight evenly, and yet you still seem to roll over and fall out. The only good part is you have now received a preview of the sky above and now know if you should go get your sunglasses before your second attempt. Or you are trying to get out of the hammock and you either put the wrong body part out first or you try to get out too fast and plop there you are on the ground making a side note to remind your husband to weed the lawn and throw down some ant killer. After your short time face down in the mud you rise to your feet with several ant bites and a slightly bruised ego and now you find yourself thinking of yet another excuse for the mishap. “Why is it that no one else seems to do this?” is a question you often ask yourself.

So here are the top ten reasons why people fall out of their hammocks that you can try out;

10. You and your neighbors try to break the world record for number of people in a hammock

9. You set up a trampoline next to your hammock and jump from trampoline to hammock

8. While in your hammock you reach down to get your drink from the ground

7. You get a friend twist the hammock, and you climb on and let it go for a spin

6. You attach a riding lawn mower to the hammock and have someone drive it around

5. When relaxing with a friend in the hammock have the lighter of you attempt to get out first

4. Starting at your back door you run as fast as you can and then dive on to your hammock

3. You and your friends have a belly flop competition on your hammock

2. You ride it cowboy style

1. While lying in hammock hold on to your dog with a leash while the neighbor lets their cat out in the back yard

So the next time you land on the ground with a spilled drink on your head and sudden desire to weed the grass try one of these excuses. I am sure no one will believe you for one second but at least your family and friends will be entertained with a good story.

Of course do not try these at home as someone will get hurt. This is for entertainment purposes only. No animals were hurt in the writing of this article and stunt doubles are of course union employed with license and bonding.

Lesbian Quiz by Comedy Humor Funny Lucu

2010-11-22T01:19:00.000-08:00

HUMOR - Are you confused about your sexual orientation? Have you attempted a single or all of the lesbian quizzes on the world wide web trying to figure your self out? If you have, you possibly nonetheless aren't confident. If you haven't don't waste your time. The only actual way to establish your lovemaking orientation is to appear deep inside your self. The response lies inside of you...in your coronary heart you possibly by now know what that solution is.

If you are looking for out quizzes and questioning your lovemaking orientation, some thing need to have occurred to make you do that. That is the 1st spot you really should commence your inner search. Had been you enticed to someone of the very same sexual intercourse? Did a lesbian scene in a movie or e-book flip you on? Ask by yourself if it was a 1-time point or if it has transpired just before. The much more sights you have acquired, the a lot more probably you are lesbian.

Alongside with inspecting your emotions towards women, you also have to assume about how you've felt towards the guys in your past. If you have been attracted to males, strive to decide if your emotions for ladies have been more powerful. Also take a seem at the variety of points of interest of every sexual intercourse you have experienced. If there are only one or 2 males you can feel of, but various ladies, that need to inform you some thing.

In simple fact, the most confusing aspects of determining your sexual orientation will in all probability middle all-around your relationships with males. Due to the fact lovemaking orientation is theorized to exist on a continuum, you may lean heavily toward lesbianism, but even now have an occasional attraction to a guy. Normally, the attraction will be of shorter length and less intensive that with women, nevertheless. Even far more confusing, it is feasible for some lesbians to take pleasure in a sexual with a guy.

The most critical issue to keep in mind is that bodily sexual intercourse is not the hallmark of lesbianism. The most important element is romantic attraction. In short, falling in enjoy. If you have fallen head in excess of heels, insane in enjoy with a woman, if you can't get her off your mind, you most likely don't require a quiz. You possibly currently know and are making an attempt to verify it.

If you have examined all these problems and nevertheless devote substantial time and emotional power in confusion about your orientation, it may be time to seek the advice of a professional to support you kind items out. It is greatest to locate a therapist or coach who specializes in sexuality and who you can experience snug with.

Some Top Things in the World You Enjoy to Know

2010-11-15T00:16:00.000-08:00

Top Dangerous Toothpaste Ingredient

1. Menthol

One last ingredient to add a minty note to your breath. Without menthol, toothpaste might taste like, well, chalk, glycerin, paraffin, detergent, titanium dioxide, and seaweed! Go ahead and ingest menthol if you like, but sipping some tea containing menthol is a far better idea than chewing on your tube of toothpaste.
Top Heist and Robbery

1. The Antwerp Diamond Heist

Antwerp, Belgium is one of the diamond capitals of the world, with 80 percent of the world's diamonds passing through the city before being sold on the market. A number of heists have taken place there, most recently a still-unsolved $28 million robbery in 2007, but the biggest of them all took place in 2003, when a team of master criminals known as the School of Turin managed to walk away with $100 million in uncut diamonds from the Antwerp Diamond Center vault. For sheer scope, ingenuity, and risk, few robberies will ever measure up to this one. The criminals had been planning the heist for years, and using copied keys and faked security camera footage, they managed to bypass the vault's multi-million dollar security system, which had been thought to be impenetrable. The thieves escaped without incident, but DNA left at the scene allowed them to be tracked to Italy, where most of the gang has since been captured. The $100 million in diamonds, meanwhile, seems to have disappeared for good.

Top Movie Icon Immortal

1. Wolverine

How is he an immortal? Wolverine's mutant healing factor keeps him in perfect health and long-lived.

X-men legend Wolverine is about to get his own film, courtesy of Hugh Jackman and the movie moguls at Marvel Studios. The reason being is that Wolverine, or Logan as he's otherwise known, stands out as one of the superior Marvel characters, thanks mainly to his superhuman healing abilities and deadly claws. Wolverine's skeleton - and claws - are unbreakable, made from a fictitious metal called adamantium, meaning he is hell on wheels and an excellent fighter. The downside? He feels pain like mortals - especially when he extrudes those notorious claws.

His ability to heal from nearly any wound and his resistance to all disease have Wolverine at the top of this list for all time, as his life won't come to an end as long as he can avoid being killed. Hmmm, maybe he won't be on this list long after all.

Top Lost City

1. Machu Picchu

Of all the lost cities that have been found and studied, perhaps none is more mysterious than Machu Picchu. Isolated near the Urubamba Valley in Peru, the city was never found and plundered by conquistadors, and it was not until historian Hiram Bingham visited it in 1911 that it became known outside of the region. The city is divided into districts, and features over 140 different structures bordered by polished stone walls. It is said to have been built in the 1400s by the Incas and abandoned less than 100 years later, most likely when its population was wiped out by smallpox brought over from Europe. There has been much speculation as to whatMachu Picchu was used for, as well as why the Incas chose such to build it in such a strange location. Some have said it was a holy temple of sorts, while others have maintained that it was used as a prison, but recent research suggests that it was probably a personal estate of the Inca emperor Pachacuti, and its location was chosen because nearby mountains figured prominently in Inca astrological mythology.

Funny Obama Jokes

2010-11-15T00:13:00.000-08:00

Obama's economy is so bad ... the porcelain of the White House is actually being done in China.

Obama's economy is so bad ... that the President is changing its slogan of "hope and change to spare!"

Obama's economy is so bad ... Saturday Night Live that is thinking about telling a joke about Obama.

Obama's economy is so bad ... that the president is running a small business on the side. Called GM.

Obama's economy is so bad ... Americans are being caught sneaking into Mexico.

Beer is better than Obama because soldiers like beer.

Beer is better than Obama because an empty beer is better than an empty suit.

Obama said "NO" to drugs, but have not heard.

Critics are saying lies about Obama ... and most of them are true. (Tip o'the hat to Winston Churchill).

In a recent speech by Obama was a kid in the back of the hall shouting anti-American hatred and making racist remarks. They turned the lights on the premises and was the Reverend Wright. For a moment I thought Obama was back in church and cried, "I can get an amen?

Recently someone wrote, "A joke of Obama on Letterman's show is as likely as a joke about Muhammad in a mosque."

If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the ocean and began to sink, to be saved? .... America!

Obama's campaign slogan "Yes we can" has become "if you will."

Senator Obama was sitting with a girl on a plane trip back to Washington. He turned to her and said, "Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with his traveling companion."

The girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said Obama's statement, "What would you like to talk?"

"Oh, I do not know," said Obama. "What What changes should I make to America?" and he smiles.

"Okay," she says. "That could be an interesting topic, but let me ask you a question first horse, a cow and a deer all eat the same thing -... However, deer grass excreted small granules, while a cow turns out a flat patty , and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you think? "
Obama, visibly surprised by the girl's intelligence, thinks for a second and finally says: "Hmmm, I have no idea."

To which the girl replies, "Do you really feel qualified to change America when you do not know shit?"

Your Presidential Candidate

2010-05-03T05:39:00.000-07:00

Top 10 Signs Your Presidential Candidate is Under-Qualified

10. Promises to improve foreign relations with Hawaii.

9. Runs a series of attack ads against Martin Sheen's character on "The West Wing".

8. His #1 choice to work on his cabinet is "That Bob Vila guy".

7. Outstanding record as Governor of Rhode Island nullified by the fact that no one really cares.

6. Got his degree in Political Economics by bribing Sally Struthers with a chocolate donut.

5. Anybody mentions Washington, he asks, "The state or the DC thingie?"

4. At the debates, answers every question with a snarled, "You wanna wrestle?"

3. Vows to put an end to the war in Pokemon and free the Pikachu refugees once and for all.

2. Says the Pledge of Allegiance as quickly as possible, then shouts, "I win!"

1. On the very first question of the debate, he attempts to use a lifeline.

Bill Clinton Comedy

2010-04-28T18:10:00.000-07:00

From the Vault: Classic Quips from Late Night

"The writers are going on strike on Monday. ... They are calling this the toughest time for comedy writing since those three weeks back in the '90s when Bill Clinton stopped dating." --Jay Leno

"Here's the kind of thing that makes this country great. A guy in Tennessee was in a food eating competition. ... He wins the competition. He ate 103 hamburgers in eight minutes. ... But you think about it, this has been a hell of a year for Al Gore. One thing after another." --David Letterman

"Anybody notice that for daylight saving, the change is later this year? It was supposed to be last week. According to the New York Times, Congress made this decision in part from pressure from the candy lobby, who wanted an extra hour for trick or treating. Isn't that unbelievable? I mean, the research lobby can't get stem cell research through. The consumer lobby, we can't get lead out of toys. But by God, when it comes to an extra hour of eating sugar, the candy lobby has the power." --Jay Leno

"Pat Philbin, the man who staged a fake FEMA news conference on the California wildfires last week, has lost his promotion because of the event. Which begs the question, 'What does it take to actually get fired from FEMA?'" --Amy Poehler

The Thieve

2010-04-28T18:09:00.000-07:00

Caught Stealing

A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from an exclusive jewelry store. "Listen," said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy the watch, and we forget about this?"

The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This is a little more than I intended to spend. Can you show me something less expensive?"

Games: Lucha Libre Mexican Wrestling Game w Cards New

2010-03-16T18:05:00.000-07:00

Lucha Libre Mexican Wrestling Game w Cards New .

Product Description
Lucha Libre wrestling card game. With a stack of cards that measure approximately 3-1/2 inches long and a stack of larger cards (with multiple images on them) that measure approximately 7-1/2×11-1/2 inches. From Mexico. New in package, pack has some slight shelf wear. Unusual… More >>

Lucha Libre Mexican Wrestling Game w Cards New

Popularity: 1%

Comedy Humor Funny Lucu

Rub It

Why It is Fun to Watch Indian Celebrities Tweeting? by Obat Gila

Funny T Shirts That Will Get You Notice

Humor And Funny One Line Jokes Crack-Up Comedy

Top Ten Reasons That People Fall Out of Hammocks by Comedy Humor Funny Lucu

Lesbian Quiz by Comedy Humor Funny Lucu

Some Top Things in the World You Enjoy to Know

Funny Obama Jokes

Your Presidential Candidate

Bill Clinton Comedy

The Thieve

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